You are getting very sleepy...I am taking over your mind. You will NOT remember my last blog entry. It was just a passing moment thing, so it doesn't matter. You do not remember it....good.

Now, yesterday my laptop crashed and I almost threw it against the wall...but instead I fixed it, by myself. Today it messed up and my mom restored it, but deleted everything in my documents! I  threw a bf. But luckily I managed to get the files back, lol. My bfs are rare and very violent lol. I wanted to let that last entry kind of sink in, but then I realized I had a good side and I needed to write about that also. So, I don't usually care how ugly or beautiful someone is, as long as thier personalities are nice. I wouldn't care if I dated someone who isn't my race, but my mom would, so I don't. I only date white guys, otherwise I would get in serious trouble. I don't mind people who ARE sane, but I can't understand them, so I usually just kind of ignore them. I have a low tolerance for stupid people, immature people, or preppy backtalking bitches who think they are all that and they can take me on AND kick my ass, which usually isn't the case.

Don't call me bipolar, or non of that stupid crap, but I really doubt I am human. If anyone sends me flame comments I will rip thier heads off! Now, about my blog.

 I am a cold person. Seriously. I finally figured out what kind of person I am. "Cold" is defined by the following symptoms:

 1. You don't care what people think about you.

2. You don't really care about anybody, friends or family, unless you've known them all your life, and only maybe less than ten people at that.

3. You can turn off your emotions, good or bad, that you may have about anybody, even those you've known all your life.

4. If some one has done somthing to you, or treated you some way, then you hate thier guts and want to kill them for a long time and then finally consider them "pitiful and not worth your hate or the time you waste hating them".

5. You are nasty and sarcastic when people ask stupid questions and barrate (did I spell that right?) them mercilessly when they ask them. and you treat them like jokes.

6. when your boyfriend breaks up with you, you cuss them out and then you forget about him the very next day, no crying or anger whatsoever.

7. You never cry, you react to emergencies and bad situations with no emotions, you're calm,. uncaring and indifferent to them and merely do what needs to be done in those situations.

8. you think humans are stupid and meaningless and all other things.

9. You can be a caring, loving person, but only when you feel like ity.

10. you are witty, nice and funny, but only show it to those who you think deserve to see your personality.(which is very few)

11. you love shows that unclude demons, blood, and violence...but you can differentiate between them. (meaning you know better than to try that shit).

There. Send me all the commenst you want, but no flames, and if I here the word "bipolar" I will drive you crazy whenever you are on.

I consider myself an outsider. A young but wise..something. I watch all the people and understand everything they do. I notice the stupid and meaningless things people do. I can predict everything someone I know does, and even other people. But of course I keep it to myself and merely smile when they do what I expected them to do. I am human, i think, but my mind isn't. I am disgusted with the human race, and even with myself. When I heard that katrina thing, about the hurricane and all the people dying.  I tried to make myself care, really I did, but  I simply didn't care. thats how I am. I have all the "symptoms"  I wrote about above. I plan on giving this cold thingy a name. you know, like "something syndrome" or something. I don't care what anybody thinks, this is a true blog, how I really am. this is like my dark side, lol.

I'm on my laptop, for once! well, at least my first time on the internet with my laptop. my momma downloaded windows xp and it fixed my entire laptop. it fixed the sound chip and internet card...its wonderful!

Dude man, I was in body wellness and I usually sit on this table with my stuff, well we had to do laps. When I got back to my "spot" there were a few african american boys, and they had covered up my stuff. I didn't say anything because officially, that is  not my "spot". I just put my coat ov er there and accidentally knocked one of thier coats, and the guy started cussing me out and stuff.  I thought it was pretty funny, but of course I didn't say that. I listened to his idiotic cussing for a minute and then shouted in his face "shut the hell up!". He just walked off, still cussing. Half an hour later we were waiting for the bell to ring and he was like "you mean, girl, you is mean". I didn't say anything, just shrugged. Luckily the bell rang. Don't you dare call me racist because I told that guy to shutup for cussing me, lol.

 I'm was in fourth period, algebra, and we had free time since we only have two days of school this week. I was at the window behind Mr Minnnick's desk, it was open and I was waving at people and saying hey and acting like an idiot, pretending to jump to my death(the window was only three feet off of the ground). I got some clear tape and taped up the slot that the window goes in when it's closed. Mr. Minnick couldn't get the window shut the first time but the second time he could...and he never knew...muahahaha!

Everybody was complaining about what they hated during dinner and I had to add my witty comments....but my best was this:

Summer (my cuz, brokenbabe): I hate it when people ignore me.

Amber (me, the witty, smart, beautiful girl, hehe): what did you say? I didn't hear you.

 Now, tell me if  I am not the most wiittiest person alive. I watched batman today, you know, the one with the actors. Not the cartoon. My favorite character is the joker because we have a lot in common.

1) We're both funny

2) We both think humans are idiots

3) We both like to kill them

4) We both hate superhero-know-it-alls. personally, they make me sick. flying around in there capes and masks and destroying those who think humans should die! tis terrible. Always winning and saving the day. I think i've revealed enough about my secret, true, demonic side. My cousin and I like to play around, but we can't do it in the house so we run outside, literally. I chose to go outside in the dark and cold at 9:00 pm...without shoes or pants on, just underwear and shirt. I'm psyhco. I've accepted it. I ran around the outside of the house two times in less than a minute, staying ahead of my cuz. I think thats quite an accomplishment, her being only 130 lbs and my being 240. All you people out there who think fat people are ugly and not athletic can kiss my big fat ass.

I'm evil. I broke the lead on my pencil! Me and pencil have known each other forever! It will have been three days this sunday! Oh my poor pencil! why oh why oh why? Did I mention that I think timbo is cool and I want him to be my daddy? lol!

Dude man, I love my blog colors, but i love red much more. Ask brokenbabe, I'm almost ridiculous when I see things that are red. I changed my blog font and title to red cuz it looks cool.

This happened a week or two before my cousin, Summer, who is also BrokenBabe, ever told me about this site.

Dude man, this girl named Christie Welch had been threatening Summer before I changed schools, and when I got there she was still doing it, even after I told everybody that I wasn't gonna let some slutty trailor park trash bitch beat my cuz up. But of course she thinks shes all that and a bag of chips, so one day-Monday two weeks ago-she came up to Summer and I guess she didn't know who I was or what I could do so she started getting in Summer's face yelling and pointing her finger. I backed her away from Summer and told her to leave Summer alone. She was like "I'll kick your ass to" and I said "do it then. hit me" I kept telling her to hit me and she wouldn't, so I called her a coward. She made a big show of putting her hand to her ear and leaning forward saying "what did you call me?" now, if I was the type who hit first, then I could have hit her right in the ear and ended that fight before it had begun. But my mother tells me to wait untill someone hits me. So I got in her face and shouted "coward". that dumbass hit me in the side of the face. Not in the nose, not in the eye, and not in the temple. IN the side of my face, with the side of her fist at that. I punched her and then she was hit me like two or three times and I kept punching her untill the resourse officer broke us up. This was at school, by the way. We both got suspended for a week. But dude man she stayed out two weeks...I think its because I punched her in the nose, but yeah, two weeks. Now she's finaly back and everybody's still talking about how I kicked her ass...that was my first fist fight too! She hasn't said anything to Summer, but Summer still thinks she will get beat up. I doubt it, because the principle threatened to throw Christie Welch out of every gaston county school, so she would have to be in a private school.

I'm out of school because I couldn't find any blue jeans to wear because I only have four pair and none of them are clean! I found some eventually but then I couldn't find a shirt that looked right with them...I'm not a prep, damn, every body knows I hate preps but you don't wear a shirt thats too short for you low cut pants if you're chubby! I'm a chubby person but at least I dress right, not like that girl joed seen, the fat slut. that was just gross. She was probably ugly too. But I'm lucky because I'm a very clean, good-looking person...and I'm a little concieted, too.

(I just realized something. For once I didn't put "dude man" in my blog. I'm like, hooked on that word.)

Dude man, I hate it when I get on Summer's computer and Summer always wants me to get off as soon as I get on...Summer says that she sees me on and that makes her want to get on, but doesn't she realize that I wouldn't be on if I wanted to get off five minutes after because She  wants to get on?!? I mean, Dude man! I thats just plain selfish on her part, but everytime I tell her that she gets all offended and mad and then she goes and tells on me! but when I do the same thing its "oh, you are sooo mean and selfish, and you even told on me for no reason!" it makes me want to scream. but of course I don't cuz i'm cool like that.

Just in case you didn't know, this happened during 4th period, algebra 1a.

Dude man, mr. minnick (my old fat algebra teacher) started the day's torture with the famous "Teacher speech" I like to think of it as a vocal "motivator". He started to talk about how we are at school to learn "cognitive reasoning", and not math, although thats included...blah blah blah. I got so bored I started shooting rubber bands at everybody...dude they are like, microscopic, so nobody saw me. I even shot the teacher with one, lol. When class was over there were little colorful rubberbands all over the floor!

btw: mwahahahahaha!

I'm still trying to get this computer apps 1 project done, It's killing me! A minute ago the teacher finally let me choose Pocket PC's, when I had web tv...I was able to finish my entire project in fifteen minutes...dude, that totally makes me sick! We have this new teacher in our computer apps 1 class...I don't think I like her, for one thing, she makes kids write "the motivater" during ASD. How utterly gay. We should motivate her out of this school and into some middle school. Then she can give those kids gay assignments like "the motivator" because they won't care. Honestly, the motivator sounds like some Arnold Schwartsenagger (can't spell that) steriotype.

Dude man, Irony makes me sick!

Dude man, am I the only one who can't find stupid Web TV in the class? Well, I'm in my Computer Applications 1 class and we are doing this project on different computer devices, well, I got "web tv". I have a lot of questions to answer about it and I can't find a single thing on the internet that will answer my questions...wait untill you hear this. I was looking it up and it brought all kinds of things about porn and bisexuals on the screen...in a site-protected computer! I almost got caught "supposedly" looking up certain sites online that are restricted (probably saved for the teachers, lol) from the computer access. Or something along those lines. What is so funny is that there are only 11 questions and I only have today and tomorrow, because I have to present them Friday!

I just got home about an hour ago...and its already almost seven! I stayed after school to take a biology test and My cousin, Summer, and I were waiting on her mother to pick us up...she was talking to her ex-boyfriend, Matt. He is a total jerk...dude man! What does she see in him? He's fat, ugly, and completely arrogant! He thinks he can say whatever he wants and do whatever he wants to whoever he wants...I told him not to hit my cousing and he did it just to provoke me! I was pissed! Then he left and some black girl named Faith, Summer, and this other ugly, blond, trailor-park trash girl was complaining about thier mothers. I said to Summer, "don't say that, your mother birthed you. I hate it when people talk about thier mothers". and that stupid slutty bitch, the blonde one, started moving her head back and forth like some trailor park trash person...getting all nasty and saying "then you need to get out of our conversation". That made me soooo mad...I'm not even going to write what I said to her next, just know that it was the meanest, dirtiest words and comments I could think of. Well, after about five seconds of this, she had to leave. I swear, and you can ask BrokenBabe, which is my cousin Summer, that I was about to jump all over that girl and beat the hell out of her, she made me so mad. Nobody talks to me like I'm some dog, even if I'm phsyco bitch from hell! Now I'm home and I have a terrible headache, I've been having them lately...my vision is getting really bad and today I couldn't read a poster two feet away from me! I think I'm going blind, seriously. But anyway, I had a terrible headache and my nerves are real bad because of the headache and I'm irritated and stressed out easily. Wish I knew what was wrong, but I think I'm going blind...that surely must be it...:(

Dude man, I hate preps...

Sorry, off to a bad start there, lol. Its true, though, I HATE preps. In fact, I hate racists too...and germans, and hitler. All these stupid people don't seem to get it through there blond heads or thick mustaches...PEOPLE ARE ALL THE SAME. there, lecture over. I was out monday because I couldn't sleep all night...I kept hearing noises and then I had a dream I was fighting some body and I woke up all trembling and full of adrenaline...anyway I came back today, which is tuesday 15, 2005 (November) and I had tests in all of my classes. I think they waited untill I was out and had a private meeting...example.

Algebra teacher: Well, Amber's out today lets give a test on the day she comes back (don't ask how they know when I come back because I have no idea).

Biology Teacher: I agree. I love making Amber get a bad grade on a test and ruin her all ready bad grades...(Evil Bitch)

Computer Applications Teacher: Lets not forget to make her stay after school and waste her time making up quizzes...yay! (Personally, I think she's a snob)

Thats just an example of these psycho teachers. anyway, I showed that computer teacher. she gave a 50 question test and I got a hundred...after only studying for five minutes! (no exaggerations).

Thats about it for today...give me comments. (you can say whatever you want because It won't effect me...heh, why would I care what you think...unless its good, of course. o_O...-_-' (shocked to annoyed, lol).